「一個讓人驚訝的實驗」 . . 在網路上…

「一個讓人驚訝的實驗」
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在網路上,我看過這麼一個實驗:
有一個科學家,把一條大魚放進有許多小魚的池裡,大魚餓了就遊上去抓小魚吃。
過了一段時間,科學家就用一個透明的玻璃瓶把大魚罩起來,再重新放進有很多魚的池子裡。開始,大魚看到小魚就馬上衝上去咬,「咚」的一聲,沒想到卻一頭撞上玻璃瓶,眼前的美食能看卻不能吃,加上肚子又餓,牠非常著急,大魚連續衝撞玻璃瓶,撞得滿頭包,都沒有吃到小魚,牠的體力漸漸的耗盡了,大魚掠食者的角度也不再雄姿萬丈,雖然牠肚子很餓,但是牠每次想吃魚,就會撞得頭破血流,慢慢的,大魚的衝撞越來越少……….
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最後,牠完全絕望了,牠放棄了捕食小魚的所有努力。
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後來,科學家把套在大魚身上的玻璃瓶取下,備受打擊的大魚沉到了池底,一動也不動了。無論有多少條小魚在牠的身邊,甚至嘴邊游來遊去,牠都不會再想張張嘴。最後,這條大魚就這麼給活活餓死了。
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是什麼最讓人失望、放棄?
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聽完這個故事,也許你會說:「師父,這條大魚真是笨啊!」
可是你們想想,大魚原來是個捕魚高手啊,可是,在牠無數次的衝撞碰壁之後,在那個隱形的壁壘面前一次次失敗之後,牠開始懷疑自己原有的捕魚能力,最後徹底絕望,完全放棄自己。
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轉給我這個故事的同修還跟我說:有一種精神上的疾病,叫做「習慣性愚蠢」。
就是說孩子在學習的過程中,會因為某些原因,比如說交不到朋友、考試考不好、或老是被罵「笨」。在孩子的大腦中 ,就會逐漸產生對自我學習的懷疑,並且喪失信心,而表現出的學習障礙。因為當孩子放棄了自己,就真的變得「越來越笨」,還可能因此交上壞朋友走上歪路。
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所以,如果整天處於這樣的負面暗示裡,孩子就會完全相信自己「真的很笨」?!
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「為了孩子光明的未來,請給予孩子更多正面、積極的鼓勵吧!」
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我給父母以下的建議:
1. 多給孩子正面暗示,多觀察孩子的長處。
2. 多給孩子鼓勵,並營造一個正面、積極向上的語言環境。
3. 營造一個光明健康的心理環境,能夠正確認識失敗。
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避免:
1. 情緒失控,無法冷靜。
2. 孩子不聽,直接開罵。
3. 一有問題,爸媽總是唸不停。
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多給孩子正面暗示與鼓勵,給予雙方積極向上的語言環境去溝通。讓孩子的身心都處於光明、健康的環境裡成長、才能幫助孩子變得自信、聰明,而且更有智慧。
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An amazing experiment
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I’ve come across this experiment on the internet:
A scientist placed a big fish into a pond with many small fishes. The big fish would swim up to catch the small fishes to eat when hungry. After a while, the scientist put the big fish in a transparent glass jar and place it back into the pond with lots of fishes. Initially, the big fish came up to bite as soon as it saw the little fishes. “Boom!”, it unexpectedly hit the glass jar. Seeing food before itself yet unable to eat, and with the increasing hunger, it became very anxious. It then continuously knocked at the glass jar until its head was full of bumps. However, it still could not eat at the small fishes. As its physical strength gradually runs out, the big fish lost its prior predatory confidence. Despite being hungry, every time it wanted to eat the fishes, it would get badly bruised. Gradually, the knocks became less..
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Eventually, it lost all hopes of catching the small fishes for food, and gave up all efforts to do so.
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Subsequently, the scientist took out the glass jar that was hindering the big fish. The big fish that had suffered several setbacks simply sank to the bottom of the pond and did not move. No matter how many small fishes swam by its side, even near his mouth, it would not open his mouth. The big fish finally starved to death.
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What is it that is most disappointing and causes one to give up?
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After listening to this story, perhaps you will say, “Master, this big fish is really stupid!”
Yet, do consider that the big fish was originally a fishing expert. Yet, after countless times of colliding with the invisible jar, in the face of the series of failures, it began to doubt its original fishing ability, eventually succumbing to total despair, and then completely giving up on itself.
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The fellow practitioner who shared this story even suggested that there is a mental illness known as “habitual stupidity”. In the process of learning, for some reasons, some children for example, are not able to make new friends, have poor tests’ results, or are always being scolded “stupid”. In such children’s minds, there is a gradual emergence of self-doubt and loss of confidence, becoming a learning disability. As the children gave up on themselves, they may actually become “more and more stupid”, and may also be misled by bad company and be wayward.
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Thus, a child who is subject to such negative cues all day may eventually be led to completely believe that he is “indeed stupid”!
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“For our children’s bright future, please give them more positive and active encouragement!”
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May I suggest the following advice to parents:
1. Provide more positive cues to children, and observe their strengths.
2. Encourage children, and create an environment of positive and active engagement.
3. Create a bright and healthy psychological environment, one that allows for correct understanding of the reasons for setbacks.
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Avoid:
1. Situations where parents have poor emotional control, or are unable to remain calm.
2. Immediate scolding when the children do not obey.
3. Whenever there is a problem, parents always nag repeatedly.
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Provide children with positive cues and encouragement, set the stage for both sides to enjoy a healthy environment for positive language and communication. Let the child’s body and mind nurture in a bright, healthy environment, so as to help children gain confidence, intelligence, and wisdom.
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#ProactivePursuitOfLifeAmbition, #Children, #SelfRealization, #CharacterEducation, #TowardOptimism, #IlluminatedBodyAndMind, #HealthyGrowth、#積極成就的人生、#孩子、#自我暗示、#品格教育、#正向陽光、#身心光明、#健康成長


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在〈「一個讓人驚訝的實驗」 . . 在網路上…〉中有 29 則留言

  1. 感恩师父慈悲分享!弟子收到!弟子反省这周看到儿子吃饭太不听话了!情绪一起就大声对他,急了还动手!真难受!反省反省!其实儿子俩都已经很乖了!而且还会向我说对不起!都是我不好!妈妈不要生气了!挺难受的打他!好像师父都知道弟子在放错!师父加持弟子改!?叩拜

  2. 是喔~久了,當神經迴路定型下來,當事人就會以為事情就是會這樣發生,所以需要建立另一個 新的神經迴路系統。好消息是:這是可以改變,學習的~
    謝謝師父一直提醒父母要給孩子一個正向,積極的環境和鼓勵。念洽感恩合十~

  3. 师父好,感恩师父慈悲开示,感恩师父慈悲的教悔和关怀护佑,感恩师父慈悲教导我们用智慧教育孩子健康成长,把握情绪,我们永远爱您师父,因为有您我们真幸福健康快乐!

  4. Thank you Master for the sharing of the wisdom of education on our children.l feel very blessed to receive this sharing as it have given me to educate myself in order to educate my children.May Buddha Bless Master and my children and me and everyone to share in this Sadhu Sadhu Sadhu

  5. 感恩师父慈悲开示!以后一定注意自己的言行,不要打骂孩子。用耐心总慈悲心客服一切困难。看了这个故事,心里很难受。我一直在犯错误。因为孩子在学校不听话,写字又慢,算题也慢,常被老师投诉。做母亲的我很是着急,回来教他就很急躁,有时候一天打三次,自己也被气病了。真是师父所说的,付出什么得到什么。师父我错了!

  6. 师父好!您的慈悲开示深受启发和鼓舞!现在想想我们在您面前都是不懂事的孩子,像一年级的学生离不开您的循循教导。当我们修行懒惰了,您正确引导走108天的八卦等等修行方式来正确培养我们的行为引导我们走向修行正规。非常感恩师父的慈悲护佑!通过这个鱼的开示,我们每一个人都是很棒的!
    感恩顶礼南无大慈大悲金菩提上师!

  7. ???!可惜有很多父母都太迟理解这种道理已经伤了不少孩子们的心,包括我自己都觉得亏对自己的孩子,妈妈在这里跟你们声“对不起”孩子们。。。???

  8. 感恩师父慈悲开示与教导!感恩师父对孩子们的关心与呵护!多给孩子鼓励赞美,少批评责备。感恩慈悲伟大的师父!祝福所有的孩子们都能健康快乐地成长、都能拥有自信光明的心态!

  9. 我也在得“习惯性愚蠢”好久了???还怀疑能拿得起“大光明”????
    “感恩师父慈悲开示!感恩师父慈悲呵护和教化!顶礼叩拜师父!?❤?????????”

  10. 感恩師父慈悲分享【一個讓人驚訝的實驗-隱形的壁壘】!?
    超有意思的實驗!
    人常常不知不覺的用言語、行為、意念樹立了一座座的隱形壁壘而不自【覺】呢……

  11. 感恩师父的慈悲开示!弟子也得到了能量加持!不管我遭受了多么大的打击,我都要坚持,不放弃。对待孩子也要用心多給孩子正面暗示与鼓励,给予双方积极向上的语言环境去沟通。让孩子的身心都处于光明、健康的环境里成长、才能帮助孩子变得自信、聪明,而且更有智慧。
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  12. 感恩師父慈悲開示,教導!感恩師父對小朋友關愛!祝願小朋友們健康快樂成長!剛入禪堂學修行或修行不久的都是小朋友願他們也健康快樂地成長!

  13. 感恩师父慈悲教诲!故事中的大鱼在牠無數次的衝撞碰壁之後,在那個隱形的壁壘面前一次次失敗之後,牠開始懷疑自己原有的捕魚能力,最後徹底絕望,完全放棄自己。这種精神上的疾病,叫做「習慣性愚蠢」。为了孩子有一个积极成就的人生,多給孩子正面暗示與鼓勵,营造積極向上的語言環境去溝通。讓孩子的身心都處於光明、健康的環境裡成長、幫助孩子變得自信、聰明,而且更有智慧!真诚顶礼尊贵的佛师!

  14. 感恩师父慈悲指点!指出“习惯性愚蠢”这种精神疾病!在人的一生中,多多少少都会遇到碰壁的事,这时多給予内心正面暗示,多看自己的長處,不气馁、不绝望、不放弃、战胜自我!正確認識失敗,学习營造一個光明健康的心理環境!叩拜恩师!

  15. 师父,您好!这也是我经常发生的缺点,我认为我身为母亲,可以直接教育我的孩子,但是我的女儿骂我说:“讲话冇技巧,太过直伤害他们。”谢谢师父在百忙中常常关心我们!感恩师父!

  16. 师父好!感恩师父慈悲父享!教育孩子一定要注意自己的言行、不要用打骂来管教他们、要耐心温柔向讲故事一样来对待他们、这样孩子懂的了道理、慢慢的就养成良好的习惯、学习也会好的也听话了!感恩师父开示!祝福师父吉祥如意!!

  17. 师父晚上?好,感恩师父慈悲开示和教悔收到?,紧记心中,用爱心感恩心去关照孩子们的成长,因为孩子们的來不一样,父母都想望子成龙,那就不忘初心,尊寻师父教悔一切都是我的错,。感恩师父祝您健康快乐,平安吉祥,法喜充满,万事如意。顶礼最尊贵的佛师叩拜。???

  18. ग्घ्ज्घ्ह्फ्घ्ग्जिघ्ह ब्फ्क्थुग्न्हु य्क्ब्फ्झु उउइफ्ग उउओएआग ह्ज्द्त्ज द्फिम्फ अव्व्र्गी स्र्ह्क्सएर क्पोप्क्ज्त न्ब्ग्य्सक म्न्ब्ब्व्क्क्क अस्द्घ्ज्क

  19. สาธุสาธุสาธุค่ะขอให้ลูกหลานเดินทางปลอดภัยตลอดไปพี่น้องเดินทางปลอดภัยตลอดไปสมหวังตลอดไปสาธุสาธุสาธุค่ะ

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