愛情的條件 . 「在愛情、婚姻裡能幸福美…

愛情的條件
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「在愛情、婚姻裡能幸福美滿的,不是對方條件如何,而是用心去感受!」
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曾經,有個年輕小伙子跟我說:「師父,我是名校畢業的碩士,工作穩定,薪水還不錯,我自認各方面條件也都還可以。可是眼看自己都快35歲了,周遭朋友一個一個成家,我也想要有自己的家庭,不知道為什麼,我就是交不到女朋友!就算認識很多不同的女孩,也沒辦法穩定發展下去。師父,請問我該怎麼辦呢?」
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我看了看他,的確長得還不錯,個子也挺高的,就問他:「那你找女朋友的時候,有什麼樣的條件?」
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他說:「因為是要以結婚為前提交往的,所以我希望她至少學歷不能跟我差太多,讀到碩士就可以了,而且要有份穩定的工作,薪水也不能太差;外型方面,我也沒有要求她要長得多好看,順眼就行,但是一定要留長頭髮,然後要會化妝,帶出門才不會沒面子;還有,我希望她是個孝順的人,性格也要溫柔,最好還能擅長廚藝,也要會打理家事,對了,不要太愛花錢,我喜歡節儉一點的。我要求的不多,差不多就是這樣了!」
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我說:「難怪你找不到女朋友!談個戀愛哪來那麼多條件?談對象的時候,不要用眼睛看,要用心去感受,相信你一定可以找到最適合你的女孩。」
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這小伙子聽了我的話之後,照著做了,不到一年就結婚了。我一瞧,他太太大學畢業,短髮,素著一張臉也沒化妝,和他當初開的條件完全不一樣,但是笑起來的樣子,就是讓人感覺很親切,挺好的一個女孩。
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他跟我說:「師父,先前您要我別用眼睛看,要用心看,我就試著去做了。我太太雖然不是我以前喜歡的類型,可是第一次見到她,我就發現她很善良、很有愛心,而且不知道為什麼,跟她在一起就是覺得舒服,我可以很放鬆。我想,過日子就是要找這樣的人吧,於是交往幾個月,就決定跟她求婚了,現在我們很幸福,謝謝師父!」
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所以,兩個人在一起,最重要的是相處起來覺得舒服、自在,說白一點,就是對彼此的期望不要太高。是人都不完美,但是所謂的婚姻,就是在欣賞彼此優點的同時,也能包容著對方的缺點,然後用真心、用愛攜手克服人生中的關卡,創造快樂、幸福的家庭。
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最後,我要祝福那些已經結婚的人「婚姻幸福」!
也要祝福那些還沒結婚的人,盡快找到「適合你的另一半」!
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#愛情、#條件、#婚姻、#用心、#婚姻幸福、#好伴侶
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The Conditions for Love

“Happiness in love and marriage does not come based on the criteria you set in choosing the other party, but on feelings of the heart!”

Once, a young lad told me, “Master, I am a Master’s graduate of a famous college, with a stable job and decent salary. I think I am eligible in many aspects. Yet, as I approach 35 years in age, I have friends around me who are all settling down. I also want a family to call my own but, I’m not sure why I just can’t find a girlfriend! Even though I know many different girls out there, there is no way to enjoy a stable relationship. Master, what should I do?”

I took a look at him. He was indeed pleasant-looking, with a tall stature. I then asked him, “When you look for a girlfriend, what kind of criteria do you seek?”

He said, “As I’m dating with the intention to marry, I hope that she is as well-educated as I am, with a masters degree. She should also have a stable job, with a salary that is not too bad. Looks-wise, I do not ask that she is gorgeous, just pleasant. However, she must have long hair, and knows make-up so that I will not lose face when we go out. I also hope that she is a filial person, with a gentle character. It is best if she is good at cooking. She should also take care of the housework; and yes, she should not spend too much as I prefer her to be a little frugal. I don’t ask for much, these are more or less all my criteria!”

I replied, “No wonder you can’t find a girlfriend! Why do you have so many conditions when looking for love? When seeking a partner, don’t look with your eyes but feel with your heart instead. I believe you can then find the best girl who suits you.”

After listening to me, the lad did as I said and got married within a year.
I saw that his wife was a graduate, had short hair, did not wear make-up, and was different from his original criteria. Yet, she was endearing when she smiled and seemed like a very good girl.

The lad said to me, “Master, you asked me not to seek with my eyes, and so I tried to do it with my heart. Although my wife does not fit into my favorite profile, I found her very kind and caring. I do not know why, but being with her is comfortable and I am very relaxed. I think I should find such a person to live with. So, after a few months, I decided to marry her and now we are both very happy. Thank you, Master!”

So, for two persons to be together, the most important thing is to get along and feel comfortable, relaxed, and be frank. Expectations of each other should not be too high. No one is perfect, so in a marriage, partners should appreciate each other’s virtues while being tolerant of each other’s shortcomings. Then, with sincerity and love to overcome the obstacles in life, both can create a joyous and, blissful family.

Finally, I would like to bless all married couples with a blissful marriage!
Also for those who have yet to marry, may you swiftly find a suitable another half!

#Love, #Conditions, #Marriage, #Heartfelt, #BlissfulMarriage, #GoodPartner


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在〈愛情的條件 . 「在愛情、婚姻裡能幸福美…〉中有 20 則留言

  1. 感恩师父开示,两个人最主要的还是情投意合,希望有缘人都能得到师父的法语甘露,得到师父赐予的法眼,让你能够慧眼识珠,得到美好的爱情。

  2. 师父好,吉祥如意!师父,以前我认为两个人有共同帮人的愿望,有共同的话题,就可以在一起,最后发现错了……原来那样只是金刚兄弟!

  3. 感恩师父慈悲开示!弟子收到照做!在没学习师父传授的佛法之前,老爱挑对方的毛病,不懂得包容对方,这样爱吵架引起烦恼导致家庭不和,从进来学习师父传授佛的理念之后逐渐在改,但是改的不够好,就最近2年改的很明显,从懂得包容的真正含义并且去执行,无论是和家人还是和其他人一切都变得开心??起来,烦恼几乎没有了,有了师父才改变了我,感恩师父给我们慈悲教化和加持!非常感恩师父!?❤???

  4. 感恩师父分享!祝福那些没有结婚的年青人早日结婚!结婚的人都得到快乐!健康!幸福!吉祥如意!祝愿师父师母永远年轻漂亮!健康!快乐!长寿!吉祥如意!叩拜恩师!

  5. 收到了!感恩师父!我老公就是那种给我感觉很舒服的人,也是在我意料之外的人。如果光是条件来说他不是我心中的白马王子,但是他心地善良可以依靠所以就非他不嫁了。感恩师父!希望我弟弟今年也能找到他的另一半幸福的生活。顶礼师父!

  6. 择偶的标准越高,选择的机会就越少,成功的概率也越低。只有用心去感受,还要务实相处起来才会舒服自在,才能营造幸福美满的爱情与婚姻,彼此相守一生白头偕老。

  7. 感恩师父!美好的爱情是:“相处不累”。要朝着这方面去努力,就是要培养好的品德:“让对方感到舒服”。学习“人品好的人,自带光芒,无论做什么,都会熠熠生辉,这辉,是照亮自己,也照亮他人“。心怀善念,了解自己,也了解对方,“心若相知,无言也默契,情若相眷,不语也怜惜;十里春风,不如有你懂我,也如我懂你”。要做一个心胸博大的人:如港口,避风又给予宁泊停靠;也如登山,各自努力,关卡时相互挽护;各自努力上进,成为各看的风景。美好的爱情,是人生的幸福!也如一个同修说的,家庭幸福了,整个世界就幸福了。感恩师父教诲!弟子努力学习,做一个幸福的人。??????

  8. 师父你好,我二哥是个没信心又蛮害羞的人,去年刚离婚又失业。
    希望师父加持让我二哥,保财早日找到好工作和好女孩结婚,年老的爸妈就不用为他操心了。顶礼叩拜师父???

  9. 收到!相信在大慈大悲尊贵无比的金菩提上师祝福下,我一定会尽快找到适合我的另一半?‍♀️?‍♀️?‍♀️?‍♀️?‍♀️?‍♀️?‍♀️?‍♀️?‍♀️

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