溝通中的平衡法則 . 夫妻間、親子間、同…

溝通中的平衡法則
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夫妻間、親子間、同事間、上下級之間……,
為什麼在不同的人際關係裡,都常出現種種誤會和不愉快?
這是因為彼此之間缺乏溝通,或溝通不當。
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人與人之間應該如何溝通?
溝通的過程中該怎樣面對負面的指責,
又如何面對生活中的讚美呢?
一起來學習吧!!
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#溝通、#接受、#忍辱、#讚美、#定力

The law of balance in communication

Between husband-wife, parent-child, work colleagues, and supervisor-subordinate……,
Why are there so many kinds of misunderstandings and unhappiness in such relationships?
This is due to the lack of inter-personal communication between these parties, or poor communication.

How should people communicate with one another?
How do we deal with negativity that develops during the process of communication; and
How do we manage the praises that we receive in life?
Let’s come and learn together!!

#Communication, #Accept, #Forbearance, #Praise, #Determination.


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不怕路途遙,就怕你堅持!! . 從前有個…

不怕路途遙,就怕你堅持!!
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從前有個年輕人,他想去遠方跟隨一位有名的大師學習,可是遲遲決定不了。
他的父親覺察到他的心情,就問他:「你為什麼猶豫不決啊?」
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年輕人回答說:「我擔心我離開太遠,萬一您和母親生病了,我不能在身邊照顧您們。」
父親伸手指指窗外說:「你看大樹上的那隻大鳥,當小鳥長大一些的時候,大鳥就把小鳥踢出鳥窩。如果你在我跟前一直猶猶豫豫,我只能也把你踢出家門!」
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年輕人還是猶豫不決:「學習的路途這麼遙遠,我怕路途艱險,還沒有到達,就碰上強盜或是誤入黑店……。」
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父親說:「你再看天空中翱翔的大雁,從來沒有想過路途上會不會有暴風雨,所以不要為未來擔憂,如果你此刻不敢上路,就永遠看不到真正的未來!」
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年輕人似乎堅定一些了,但還是有些擔憂。他弱弱地說:「我還怕我自己太笨,不能學有所成,會很丟人……。」
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父親繼續鼓勵道:「你看池塘裡的王八(鱉),牠們一旦咬到什麼東西,就絕不鬆口,對自己堅持的東西鐵了心,從不輕易放棄。」
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最後父親告訴他:「這個世界上聰明人很多,但是能將自己立下的目標堅持到底的人卻不多,真正成功的往往是那些一諾千金的人。所以堅定信念,就沒有什麼是學不好的。」
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想獲得成功,需要一份勇氣和堅持。
尤其是當面對挫折和困境時,只有不畏艱難,堅定信念,不輕易放棄,才能達到成功的彼岸。
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「心」是這個世界最難穩定的東西。
「禪修」就是要將最容易變化的東西,修成穩定。
一個「穩定、堅持」到最後的人,做任何事情就容易成就。
——金菩提禪語
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#堅持、#堅定信念、#成功、#一諾千金、#金菩提宗師說故事
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Worry not about the long journey. Persistence will bring you to your destination.
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Once there lived a young man who wanted to travel to faraway lands to learn from a great Master. However, he remained undecided about making the trip.
Sensing the young man’s hesitation, his Father asked “Why have you not made up your mind?”
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The young man replied “I am worried that if I am away and either you or Mother falls ill, I will not be around to look after you”.
Father pointed outside the window and explained “Look at that bird on the tree. When the chicks are grown, she will set them free from the nest. If you continue to hesitate, I will have to boot you from my house!”
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The young man continues to hesitate “The road to travel is far and treacherous. I am worried that the journey will be difficult and I will meet with many obstacles”.
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Father said with encouragement “Look up at the wild goose flying high up in the sky. He does not worry about meeting a storm during his flight. So do not worry needlessly about the future. If you do not start you journey, you will never know the real future”.
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Although the young man was more determined after hearing his Father’s words, he still had some reservations. “I am worried that I am not smart and will not be a good learner. It will be so embarrassing if I fail”.
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Father continues to encourage him “Look at the tortoise in the pond. When he latches onto something, he will never let go. Likewise, strengthen your resolve and do not give up easily!”
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In his parting words, Father said “There are many smart people in this world but not many of them have the resolve to follow through with their commitments. The successful ones are those who are true to their words. So strengthen your resolve and nothing will be insurmountable”.
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If you want to succeed, you will need courage and resolve. These are especially important when you are besieged with difficulties and obstacles. As long as you do not back down and stand firm to your beliefs, you will eventually emerge as the winner.
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Your heart is the most difficult to hold steadfast.
Meditation is best suited for stabilizing such fluidity.
A person who is full of resolve and determination will always prevail and be successful in all his endeavors.
——Grandmaster JinBodhi
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#Resolve, #Determination, #Succeed, #BeTrueToYourWords, #StoryFromMasterJinBodhi


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問: 「在修法的過程中,遇到特別不想修的…

問:
「在修法的過程中,遇到特別不想修的時候該怎麼辦呢?」
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答:
比如有人說:有一段時間,我就是不想修大禮拜。
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其实這樣的放棄和討厭的心理,說明你前面的功課做得很好,想放弃不修的想法都是考驗。

在很多年前我就講過,修行的過程分幾個階段。
一開始沒進門修行的時候,全部是懷疑;
再來是修進門的第一個階段是最快樂的,就好像自己到了天堂;
但在天堂之後就是地獄,那是第二個階段,而這個地獄就叫做昏沉。
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為什麼第一個階段叫作快樂、第二個階段叫作昏沉呢?
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昏沉有幾種反應,第一種就是對修行沒有了先前的那種快樂和刺激的感受,和之前的體會都不一樣。還有呢,就是開始想放棄了,說「我不修這個法了」;再接下來是討厭,討厭這個法,還同時對師父和對這個法產生不信任感,這些都是在這個昏沉階段中必然會發生的現象。
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那怎麼辦呢?我要給大家指條明路的話,就是:就像定好了要登山,無論是下雨了、下雪了、刮大風了,我一樣去登,我定好的事情我從不會改變。應該培養這種習慣,這個習慣就是堅持,只因為有了這個堅持的習慣,你就能成功。
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#修行、#堅持
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Question: What should we do if we suddenly encounter a strong feeling to give up on our practice?

Response:
For instance, you may encounter periods when you feel reluctant to practice the Full Prostration. The notion of giving up and the self-resistance that you face is in fact an affirmation that you have been practicing very well, and thus the thoughts to give up is a test of your resolution.

Many years ago, I have shared that there are several stages in the meditation journey.
Prior to taking the first step into the practice, one feels doubtful;
After one steps into the practice, at the first stage, he experiences happiest, just like in heaven.
However, after heaven, the second stage is hell –- and this “hell” is also known as feeling “dazed”.

Why is the first stage identified as “happiness”, and the second stage as “dazed”?

There are variations to feeling “dazed” at this stage, the first of which is the lack of the prior feeling of euphoria and stimulation in the practice as in the initial stage. In addition, one starts to give up, saying “I’m not going to continue this practice..” following which annoyance sets in. At this point, the annoyance extends to the practice, developing into distrust of the master and the dharma. These are typical signs during the “dazed” phase and are inevitable.

What can one do? To indicate a clear path to you, I would say: just as you’d promised to scale the mountain, regardless of rain, snow, or gale, you should stay focused and proceed as you’d promised and not change your mind. Cultivate this habit to persevere on because with this determination, one would succeed.

#MeditativePractice, #Determinationrnrn問:
「在修法的過程中,遇到特別不想修的時候該怎麼辦呢?」
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答:
比如有人說:有一段時間,我就是不想修大禮拜。
.
其实這樣的放棄和討厭的心理,說明你前面的功課做得很好,想放弃不修的想法都是考驗。

在很多年前我就講過,修行的過程分幾個階段。
一開始沒進門修行的時候,全部是懷疑;
再來是修進門的第一個階段是最快樂的,就好像自己到了天堂;
但在天堂之後就是地獄,那是第二個階段,而這個地獄就叫做昏沉。
.
為什麼第一個階段叫作快樂、第二個階段叫作昏沉呢?
.
昏沉有幾種反應,第一種就是對修行沒有了先前的那種快樂和刺激的感受,和之前的體會都不一樣。還有呢,就是開始想放棄了,說「我不修這個法了」;再接下來是討厭,討厭這個法,還同時對師父和對這個法產生不信任感,這些都是在這個昏沉階段中必然會發生的現象。
.
那怎麼辦呢?我要給大家指條明路的話,就是:就像定好了要登山,無論是下雨了、下雪了、刮大風了,我一樣去登,我定好的事情我從不會改變。應該培養這種習慣,這個習慣就是堅持,只因為有了這個堅持的習慣,你就能成功。
.
#修行、#堅持
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Question: What should we do if we suddenly encounter a strong feeling to give up on our practice?

Response:
For instance, you may encounter periods when you feel reluctant to practice the Full Prostration. The notion of giving up and the self-resistance that you face is in fact an affirmation that you have been practicing very well, and thus the thoughts to give up is a test of your resolution.

Many years ago, I have shared that there are several stages in the meditation journey.
Prior to taking the first step into the practice, one feels doubtful;
After one steps into the practice, at the first stage, he experiences happiest, just like in heaven.
However, after heaven, the second stage is hell –- and this “hell” is also known as feeling “dazed”.

Why is the first stage identified as “happiness”, and the second stage as “dazed”?

There are variations to feeling “dazed” at this stage, the first of which is the lack of the prior feeling of euphoria and stimulation in the practice as in the initial stage. In addition, one starts to give up, saying “I’m not going to continue this practice..” following which annoyance sets in. At this point, the annoyance extends to the practice, developing into distrust of the master and the dharma. These are typical signs during the “dazed” phase and are inevitable.

What can one do? To indicate a clear path to you, I would say: just as you’d promised to scale the mountain, regardless of rain, snow, or gale, you should stay focused and proceed as you’d promised and not change your mind. Cultivate this habit to persevere on because with this determination, one would succeed.

#MeditativePractice, #Determination


https://www.facebook.com/1656157281338091_1985348258418990